Fifty Sounds by Polly Barton

Author:Polly Barton
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Liveright
Published: 2022-02-09T00:00:00+00:00

¶ kasa-kasa: the sound of the desert heat in the heart or the desert heart in the heat

THE MORNING I TOOK MY leave from Y, he came to his door to say goodbye, as he always did. In the genkan sat his gladiator sandals: thick leather strips woven into a burned pie lattice, so well-worn that the leather had grown soft and saggy. I loved those sandals. I loved them and I loved the world that contained them. It was a world where every item had a provenance, which I could ask about and which would be related to me with satisfaction, even relish; which would be interesting to me because it mattered to him. He slipped his bare feet into them as he faced me, so he wouldn’t be standing on the dirty floor. I was now over the threshold.

“Goodbye,” he said in English, then leaned over and kissed me, and stroked my cheek. “Have a nice life.”

Of course, he wasn’t to know how “have a nice life” sounded—by which I suppose I simply mean, I don’t think he did know. I think he wanted the words to say exactly what they seemed to say, but they stabbed me regardless. I might have lingered, talked it through with him, but it was too risky to stand about outside his flat in case the neighbors saw me. We touched hands, and I moved off, down the steps and onto the road, and he closed the door softly.

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